


On a Wing and a Prayer

by Lady_Eglantine



Series: Jane Shepard [1]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-07
Updated: 2015-06-14
Packaged: 2018-04-03 09:06:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4095130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Eglantine/pseuds/Lady_Eglantine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shepard gained quite the reputation on the SR-1 as a terrible driver. With the discovery of the M-44 Hammerhead on the SR-2, that reputation continues to follow her. Collection of connected one-shots. Takes place during ME2. Heavy emphasis on Shakarian. </p><p>Rated M for smut in Part 4.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Another fic from Fanfiction.net, with minor tweaks, originally posted January-March 2013. This was inspired by my extreme dislike for the Mako and the Hammerhead (I’m not a big vehicle exploration lover) and picturing Jane gaining quite the reputation among her crew for her notorious driving skills.

-1-

There were many things Commander Jane Shepard was good at. She could pick off people in a row, with clean headshots that left no collateral damage in their wake. She could talk anyone down, reason with someone who had a fully loaded gun pointed at her unshielded face without batting an eye. She could make friends with those who weren't looking for one, just by giving them the time of day and actually caring about their problems. She could inspire those who followed her to journey into hell itself without any hesitation or thought of desertion.

But there were two things Garrus Vakarian would stake his Viper rifle and vigilante salary on that Shepard was not good at.

Dancing and driving.

When Garrus had arrived back on the Normandy and was up and about after his run-in with the gunship, he took the time to thoroughly explore the ship. There had been no sign of the Mako that would have inhabited the cargo bay like on the old Normandy. It had given him something to work on, certainly, but Garrus could not say he would miss it.

Truth be told, he was ecstatic. No more would he have to ride around with Shepard behind the wheel, as he dug his talons into the leather seat, trying to hold on so he wouldn't be thrown violently around, even with a seatbelt on. The front seat was the safer place, but he was still susceptible to bumping his head on the roof that only hovered a few inches above him or jamming his knees into the underside of the panel in front of him.

No one wanted to be in the back. Whoever had designed the Mako had made the brilliant decision that seatbelts in the back were not necessary. Unless being tossed back and forth from side to side like a rag doll sounded like fun, anyone with sense tried to avoid the bench seat like the plague. Unfortunately, Garrus found himself back there on numerous occasions. At first, Garrus was forced to death grip the head rest in front of him, until he found a small cut-out beside him in the seat big enough for his talons to slide through and grab onto.

Sometimes when they were in a hurry, or being shot at and needed to get back in, both squadmates were forced to sit in the back as it was the easiest area to get to, which came with its own problems. It had hurt like hell when he smacked his face plates right into Wrex's shoulder pads one time, and they would have collided head on if Wrex hadn't reacted fast enough. Not the only instance where he got too close for comfort with his other squadmates.

If it wasn't that, it was the nausea. Garrus liked to think he had a strong constitution, but take a ride with Shepard, even someone with an iron stomach would have trouble getting his bearings after stepping out of a Mako that had just done flips in the air as it glided off the top of a mountain.

So when that cargo door opened on the volcanic planet of Zeona to reveal the Hammerhead, Garrus's stomach lurched at the fevered glow in Shepard's sapphire eyes he could view through her helmet.

"Spirits have mercy," he murmured, one half teasing, the other dead serious.

Shepard turned to face Garrus, presumably overhearing him. "Come on, Garrus. You know you want to take a ride."

"I agree. We really should test it out, make sure it's worth bringing along." Miranda. The calm, icy Cerberus operative who liked to have her finger on the pulse of every little thing that happened on the Normandy. Why Shepard brought her along, Garrus had no idea, but Shepard seemed to trust her, even like her. She had told him helping Miranda rescue her sister allowed her to see a more likable, softer side. Garrus certainly hadn't seen it yet, but he would take Shepard's word for it.

_How in the hell am I going to get out of this?_

"I'm sure it's fine. They wouldn't have bothered locking it back up if it wasn't," Garrus said, watching with dread as Shepard approached the tank.

"We don't know anything, which is why we should test it," Miranda replied, not bothering to hide her irritation towards Garrus's reluctance.

Garrus wished Tali was there. She would have understood, even joined in on his protest. Why did she have to take fire on the Alarei and get an infection?

"You hear that, Vakarian? My XO agrees we should test it. You're out-voted two to one." Shepard ran her gloved hand over the metal plating, finding the handle for the hatch. "So what do you say we hop in and put this through her paces?"

Seeing no other way out, Garrus slowly followed Shepard through the small opening. The space was even more cramped than the Mako had been. The extra front seat had been sacrificed, with only the driver's seat in the front and a two person bench seat in the back. Great, just what he wanted. Risk toppling onto Miranda and ending up with a biotic blast to his already damaged face.

He slinked into the Hammerhead at Shepard's insistence to hurry. He really didn't like the eager look in her eyes, like a child waiting to open presents on her birthday. Not to say he didn't find it attractive, how her eyes lit up like that, illuminating her whole face (now hidden by her helmet), but just not for this.

He scooted to the farther end, growing more discouraged by the lack of any type of harness or the very least a place to properly death grip in cases of sudden jumps.

Miranda climbed in after him, closing the hatch behind her and positioning herself besides Garrus. The air immediately began to pressurize, allowing everyone to take off their helmets or masks, in Miranda's case.

Garrus could proudly say he didn't jump off his seat when the VI came online, welcoming them to the M-44 Hammerhead infantry fighting vehicle, but he did twitch at the sudden noise.

Shepard tossed Garrus her helmet, obviously trusting him to hang onto it for her. "Little nervous back there, Vakarian?"

"With you behind the wheel again, Shepard? Couldn't possibly imagine why." When he first joined up, they hadn't really bantered back and forth like this. As he got more comfortable around her and stopped seeing her as this superhuman icon, saw her as a real friend, it became more natural, especially during missions. The banter only increased on the SR-2, partly as a coping mechanism for Garrus after everything that happened to him (he had always relied on humor to make a situation better), but also for a different reason entirely.

Shepard turned back up front. "So many buttons up here. Wonder what they all do?"

"We have a VI, Shepard. Let it tell you!" The last thing they needed was Shepard to go around pressing buttons when she had no idea what they did.

Apparently Shepard decided to ignore that advice, and like a child who had been warned against touching something, she tapped it and the Hammerhead jolted up into the air like it was on a trampoline before gliding back down to the rock surface.

"The thrusters seem intact and the jump mechanic's adequate," Miranda remarked, completely unfazed by the sudden jump. Even Garrus had to admit that wasn't too bad. It could have been a lot worse. At least the Hammerhead jumped up in a straight line and Shepard wasn't going to try to move forward while jumping, attempting a landing that would end with scrapes and bruises.

"On one of the panels, it's got something marked on the radar. Looks like it could be a mineral deposit," Shepard called back over the hum of the engine. "This is great! Now I can retrieve minerals while out on missions instead of spending all that time scanning planets on the galaxy map, wasting all those probes."

The pain and misery it could cause to everyone riding with her would not be worth a few bits of iridium here, a few bits of platinum there.

"Now let's see if we can get this to go forward. Everybody hang on while we make the jump over this ledge up ahead."

Garrus clenched his gloved talons down on the bench seat, prepping himself.

Miranda just stared at him, a puzzled and slightly exacerbated expression on her face. "What's gotten into you, Vakarian?"

"He doesn't have faith in my driving abilities," Shepard replied from up front, hand hovering over a thruster control, ready to push it forward. She didn't sound offended at all by it. Nor she was denying how reckless she was in a combat vehicle. Rather she sounded extremely amused.

"For good reason, Shepard. Still trying to figure out where you learned to drive." He then turned to Miranda, Shepard's hand falling on the control out of the corner of his eye. "You'll understand soon enough, Lawson."

Almost on cue, the Hammerhead propelled forward, jumping over the ravine and landing across in a not-so-gentle fashion, prompting its occupants in the back to jettison forward. Garrus was able to hang on, having already clutched the underside of the seat, but Miranda was not so fortunate, gripping the back of Shepard's seat to prevent herself from toppling forward even more, knees digging into the chrome floor. That must have hurt in that skin tight outfit.

Shepard fiddled around with more of the buttons until she finally caved and requested the VI's assistance at mining the minerals underneath them.

Forceful vibrations shook the Hammerhead as it extracted them, the trio shaking in complete synchronization with the movements. Garrus didn't bother to hide the sigh of relief when it was over and he was pretty sure he heard Miranda do the same.

"Don't remember the Mako ever doing that," Garrus commented, releasing his grip ever-so-slightly. He could already feel the headache building in his head.

"Never had to retrieve minerals with it," Shepard pointed out, straightening herself out. "Looks like the VI is picking up a few others out there, all scattered around the area. We still need to test out the weapons systems too."

Garrus didn't know how much more of this excitement he could take. It was almost laughable. He had shown no hesitation in taking on all three of Omega's most powerful gangs, yet the moment he climbs back into a vehicle with Shepard behind the wheel, suddenly his adventurous streak has run dry.

"We are running low of our supplies for upgrades." Miranda sounded less certain than before. Judging by the uneasy look in her eyes, she had begun to realize what Garrus had dreaded all along. "It would be good to have more. And test the weapons in a contained environment, not while out in the field."

Shepard didn't need anymore incentive to continue forward in this maze of volcanic rock and lava. She combed through this barren wasteland in search of precious minerals, shooting at silos blocking their path (proving the efficiency of the cannon firing system), jumping from ledge to ledge, jostling Garrus and Miranda around in the back. He kept his eyes closed rather than watching them pass by their surroundings at a ridiculous velocity. Less of a chance of his stomach churning than it already was.

Garrus had long ago given up on trying to stop Shepard and instructing her on her driving, but Miranda shared no such reluctance. As time went on, her voice grew more shrill and more urgent, like she was convinced the longer she stayed in the Hammerhead, the more likely Shepard was going to crash it into the side of a rock.

Shepard. Making cracks in the ice-queen's shell in more ways than one.

Shepard kept on shouting back reassurances over the loud roar of the thrusters mid-jump, saying she hadn't killed anyone in her driving yet. That was true, but Garrus didn't think he or Miranda wanted to test those claims.

"Pull up, Shepard! Higher!" Miranda cried at the final jump for the last mineral.

The Hammerhead landed in a spectacular fashion on top of the mineral pile, smacked towards the ground like it had been biotically slammed, propelling both of them forward again, but at least neither of them ended up on the floor.

Garrus couldn't have been happier when the VI declared all mineral deposits in the area had been picked clean. Shepard wasted no time in contacting the Normandy for extraction. Garrus chanced a quick glance at Miranda and swore the color of her face seemed slightly green. He stopped himself from telling her he told her so, settling for a look inside. Miranda sent a piercing glare back, though it didn't have the same bite as her glares usually did.

When they landed in the hangar bay, Miranda was the first one out, informing Shepard she would file the necessary report to the Illusive Man before scurrying out the tiny opening despite her obvious queasiness, as if fearing Shepard would suggest going back out there in the Hammerhead.

"Looks like I lost another one."

She still didn't seem remorseful or irritated, still amused.

"That's an achievement to make your XO crack under pressure. You should feel proud," Garrus replied. He hadn't realized it before, but he liked it, seeing Shepard so care-free, a luxury they could rarely indulge in these days, all in the name of defeating the Collectors. Really hard to truly relax with the fate of billions on your shoulders.

"She may be my XO on paper, Garrus, but as far as I'm concerned, you'll always be my second-in-command," she replied softly. When Garrus made to argue against it, she cut him off. "You are a good leader, Garrus, you just had bad luck. It happens to everyone."

Listening her speak about him with such confidence, he almost believed it. She truly was an incredible woman, unlike anyone he had ever met. The fact she had showed an interest in him, when she could have had so many others. She had told him she didn't want something closer to home. She wanted him, the broken vigilante and failed C-Sec officer...he still couldn't believe his luck.

"Maybe, but you're still a better one." He took pleasure in seeing the tender light appear in Shepard's eyes. "And you'll need all your charisma at the forefront if you have any hope of convincing Miranda back inside this metal death-trap," Garrus said, resuming the banter between them.

"I have nine other people to charm into coming with me if she won't, Garrus. Provided you and Tali don't talk," Shepard said, following along, in a tone that she fully expected them to spread the rumor about their commander's abysmal driving skills and that she should be kept leagues away from any driving vehicle.

Garrus raised his hands, palms up. "Point the finger at Joker. He's the gossip, not us."

Shepard unstrapped herself from her seat, climbing to the back to retrieve her helmet, which Garrus handed to her without being asked to. Surprisingly, she placed it down on the seat behind her, inching closer to Garrus.

"But Joker doesn't have the same experience you guys do. And you were in it more times than Tali," she continued, her hand reaching out to gently grasp his wrist.

"Only because you insisted on taking me on more missions," Garrus brought up, sparks jolting through him at the contact. He suddenly felt warmer than usual as Shepard continued moving closer, almost to the point the chest plates of their armor were touching and their faces were only inches apart.

"It's all in my charm. I can be pretty persuasive on occasion."

Garrus's browplate rose. "How could I refuse the requests of a beautiful woman? That wouldn't have been very gentlemanly," he said, his sub-harmonic dominant, desire for her plain in his voice.

Her eyes glittered feverishly again, but for a different reason entirely. She hoisted herself onto his lap, steadying herself on the collar of his armor. Though surprised, Garrus immediately placed his hands on her hips to keep her in place. They hadn't touched each other like this before, gotten so close in each other's personal space. Garrus didn't think this would happen so soon.

"Thought...we agreed...disrupt the crew as little...as possible." Garrus's words came out raggedly, fighting the urge to strip her armor off one piece at a time and take her right then and there against the rock-hard seat. He wasn't some overly-hormonal teenager anymore. He had more self-control than that, but Spirits it was difficult.

"We did." She undid the latches of her glove, tossing it beside the helmet. Her hand rested on his shoulder then ended up on his scarred plates, stroking what was exposed with her thumb. "I'm hopefully just giving you something more pleasant to think about when you end up back here."

"How do you possibly hope to do that?" he breathed harshly, sending barely visible ripples across Shepard's skin at the contact.

She responded by placing her lips against his mouth plates in a human kiss.

Turians never did anything like this, but he had seen enough human couples out and about on the Citadel to know the basic gist behind the concept. His mandibles started fluttering against her cheeks, tickling her skin and sending little shivers down her body. One hand moved of its own accord to tangle itself in her shoulder-length auburn hair, keeping her almost sweet-tasting lips locked onto his plates. He now wished he had taken his gloves off, so he could properly feel the strands between his talons for the first time, but that would have to come later. She emitted a small pleased groan into his mouth at the contact, which sent his own pleasurable jolt through his body, hearing her respond like that to him.

When she finally pulled away, he took in her flushed face and rounder lips from kissing him, the longing for him in her eyes mirroring his. "Was that enough, Garrus?"

Garrus hummed, pretending to deeply think about it. "Might need a little more reassurance. I'm all about being thorough."

She leaned back down to kiss him again, not needing further encouragement, but her lips only brushed against his plates before they were interrupted by EDI, calling for Shepard and informing her Samara asked to see her once she arrived, a matter of great importance.

"Guess that'll have to do for the moment, big guy," Shepard said, moving off him and forcing herself to calm her own heavy breathing.

Not wanting to break physical contact yet, Garrus latched onto Shepard's gloved hand, lacing her five fingers through his three. "Building up the anticipation will be worth it."

A wide smile curled on Shepard's face. "Savoring the last shot before popping the heat sink?"

"Something like that."

Shepard pulled away her hand, albeit with some reluctance, grabbing her helmet and glove. Before she climbed her way up out of the open hatch, she shot Garrus another mischievous grin, silently promising him that he would end up back in the Hammerhead, whether he liked it or not.

He decided as he followed her up, that if it allowed him to see that gorgeous and care-free smile more often, any moment of nausea, bruising or feelings of weightless as they careened through the air in the tin can that passed for a vehicle would be worth it.


	2. Part 2

-2-

Even after everything that had happened to Garrus in the past two years, it was still good to know he could take pleasure in the simple things in life.

Garrus twirled his glass of wine around with his talons, a special brew from a turian colony on Oma Ker Shepard had found for him while out on the Citadel. He took a healthy swig, staring out at the sky, dotted with twinkling stars, wincing when he raised his arm too suddenly. He was certain that pain and subsequent bruise wouldn't go away for quite some time, not after how forcefully he had slammed into it in that sky car on Illium, chasing down that spectre who was working for the Shadow Broker...

_"There she is! We can't lose her, Shepard!" Liara cried from the front seat, pointing at the direction Tela Vasir had flew off in. Garrus was once again stuck in the back, but at least there was some type of harness this time._

_"We won't, Liara," Shepard reassured her, increasing the throttle until the buildings and cars were passing by them in a blur._

_"Hang a right! No, left!"_

_"I'm on her!"_

_Shepard kept the throttle up, keeping up right behind her. Then Garrus noticed Vasir heading towards a construction site._

_"We're not going into the construction site, are..." Liara began, asking the same question Garrus wanted to. They received their answer when Shepard drove in between two beams, the beams too close for comfort. "Oh, goddess..."_

_Garrus breathed a sigh of relief when they passed through without a scratch or bumping into the side of a building on the way out. They evened out, heading into a driving tunnel._

_"I'm not letting her escape with that data!" Garrus had never heard that level of coldness and determination from Liara before. Quite a long way from the shy archaeologist they had picked up from the crumbling Prothean ruins on Therum two years ago._

_"Go, go, go, go, go, go!" Liara yelled as they passed between two freighters when exiting the tunnel, the top one lowering itself closer to the bottom, closer to crushing them._

_"I'm going!" Shepard said, irritation in her voice. Liara should have known how much Shepard disliked other people telling her how to drive. Not that it stopped any of them back on the SR-1 from doing exactly that._

_"Getting a little touchy there, Shepard?" Garrus called from the back, giving into the urge to rile her up._

_"You going to offer driving tips too, Vakarian?" She said it like a question, but Garrus could tell it was more an exasperated statement._

_"Probably." Garrus noticed Vasir making a sharp turn. "She turned left, by the way."_

_Just for that, Garrus was sure Shepard made the turn extra sharp._

_"Traffic! Oncoming traffic!"_

_"We'll be fine!" Garrus didn't know how Shepard could be so confident, weaving between the cars, even going with opposite traffic. How they missed hitting someone heads-on, going seventy or more mph, Garrus had no idea. Maybe spirits actually did exist._

_"She's dropping proximity charges!" Liara pointed out ahead of them._

_Shepard veered right, just missing one going off. "I noticed."_

_They almost made it to the end without being in the blast radius, but Shepard lost control for half a second when a mine exploded and sent ripples through the car, sending them right towards the last mine._

_The force of the blast had Garrus flying into the side of the car, his shoulder taking the brunt of the impact with a loud thunk. Even with his shoulder pad, it still hurt just as badly as when he smacked into Wrex in the Mako._

_"You ok back there, Garrus? You didn't hit your head, did you?" She must have heard his curse and the loud noise as he hit the door. The change in Shepard was immediate. Probably due to their -Garrus still didn't know what to call it exactly, but it was something more than friendship, least he hoped- change in relationship._

_"I'm alright, Shepard. If I survived a rocket to the face and the number of times we catapulted off mountaintops with no harness, I'm good for life."_

_"Where's your sense of excitement, Garrus?"_

_"I left it back on Sharjila the first time you jumped off a mountain without using the thrusters."_

_"If you two are done, she's got reinforcements!' Liara was right. Shadow Broker agents in a transport vehicle were tailing them._

_"What kind of guns does this thing have?"_

_"It's a taxi! It has a fare meter!"_

_Garrus's mandibles clicked, containing a dry laugh at Shepard's curse to the news. "You want to get out and charge them cab fare? I'm sure they'd be good for it, being paid by the Shadow Broker and all."_

_"You're such a smart-ass." But he didn't miss the affection laced within those words._

_"Truck." Liara cried at the sight of the mercs firing at a truck to force it into the middle of the road in an attempt to block their way._

_"I know."_

_The mercs apparently weren't satisfied with that and fired at the truck, causing it to explode in a blaze of orange and red._

_"Truck!"_

_"I know!" Shepard swerved to the side, hugging the wall of the tunnel._

_Liara let out a startled cry at the action, death gripping the edges of the seat, like she did so many times on the Mako._

_"There we go!"_

_"You're still enjoying this," Liara said, getting her breath back. Garrus knew she wasn't just referring to the sky car._

_It only took another chase through oncoming traffic, avoid crashing into a truck, and ram into Vasir's car until she finally crash-landed onto Azure, some kind of luxury hotel._

_Liara never looked happier to be back on solid ground. For his part, Garrus was just happy his heart hadn't given out from all the furious pounding it did in his chest._

_He should have been more apprehensive about the thought of going back into the Hammerhead after this little chase, but he still found himself thinking back to that kiss, the feel of her pliant lips on his plates, the intimate touch on his scars..._

"Good to see you in here, Garrus. Coming for a visit or for the drinks?"

Garrus was startled out of his thoughts when Kasumi Goto strolled in, rubbing her elbow.

There was something about Kasumi Garrus liked. Even though she was a master thief, he had to respect her abilities. She was also extremely likable. And he liked to think the feeling was mutual.

Though lately, there was something whenever they spoke that irked him. Like she knew something he didn't and was bursting at the seams to say something.

"How'd your mission on Karumto go?"

Kasumi flopped down on a nearby couch seat, her hood still firmly in place, keeping part of her face in shadow.

"We were fine until Shep activated some sensors, which caused a power grid overload and instability in the volcano. Other than that..."

Garrus noticed Kasumi hadn't stopped running her fingers over her black-clothed elbow. "I'm guessing you were treated to some of Shepard's infamous driving moves."

"You and Tali weren't kidding. I thought it was just a joke. Sorry I doubted either of you." Kasumi cringed as she pressed down on a more tender area.

Garrus drank the last bit of wine in his glass, placing it on the bar. "It's alright. Lawson didn't believe me either when I tried warning her."

After a few missions with the Hammerhead, Miranda had tried talking to Shepard about her driving habits, how Cerberus didn't spend all that time and effort just so she could kill herself in a wreck. Shepard had thanked her for her concern, as sweetly and calmly in a way only Shepard could pull off, but had assured Miranda she had everything under control.

Miranda had watched Shepard walk away, only turning to Garrus when Shepard had been out of earshot.

"You can talk some sense into her, can't you? She'd actually listen to you."

Garrus had answered that was highly unlikely. Shepard did as she pleased where her driving was concerned. A diplomat to the end, but inside a vehicle with her behind the wheel, there was no room for debate.

Letting out a defeated sigh, Miranda had thrown a word of caution his way before returning to her quarters. "Then God have mercy if you end up back in there." The use of the word "you," not "we," had been quite telling. Willing to run away from her father and take her sister from under her father's nose, no problem. Shepard's driving was clearly a whole other matter.

"I take it she believed you after the fact? I haven't heard her volunteering herself for missions whenever Shepard mentions the Hammerhead."

"The Cerberus cheerleader couldn't take it, huh? Figures she's all talk."

Jack had snuck in completely unnoticed. Surprising with those clunky black boots she always wore. Garrus had always tried looking nowhere else but her face, but he'd always catch a glimpse of a tattoo and even then it'd hurt his eyes to see those marks seared into her skin. Thankfully, she had lately taken to wearing a black tank, which covered more of her skin.

Jack moved to the bar, pouring a healthy shot of something Garrus didn't recognize.

"It was exhilarating. Never would've thought Shepard was such a daredevil behind the wheel. Being such a girl-scout and all."

Of course Jack would find that fun. Garrus believed, of the ones who had gone, only she and Grunt felt that way (or at least Grunt hadn't seen what the problem was; any cuts and scars were to be worn as badges of honor).

Jacob had ridden with Grunt. Garrus had bumped into him afterwards, asked him how it went. Jacob had tried to play it off as no big deal and that he had been in worse, not wanting to say anything against Shepard, but it was all too clear to Garrus when he had changed the subject.

Tali had ridden with Legion down to Corang to extract data at geth-filled sites. Tali had told Garrus later it was everything she had remembered, jumps and all. Even Legion had expressed concerns to Shepard, telling her that their chances of crashing increased by 78.9% with her at the wheel.

Talk and rumors would make their way to the others soon enough, but it was uncertain how Samara and Krios would react. Maybe they wouldn't care. Zaeed would probably react the same as Grunt and Jack. Knowing Mordin, he would look at Shepard's driving from a completely medical standpoint and try to figure out why her aggression manifested itself in a vehicle.

"That's not really the word I'd use, Jack," Kasumi argued. "In case you forgot, we almost melted when Shep jumped off that rock. How we weren't on fire..."

Jack downed her shot, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. "Risk makes life exciting. You're a thief. Sure you've done some risky shit."

"Not in a moving vehicle while over lava."

Garrus leaned against the backing of the seat with the right side of his body, carefully rolling his shoulder to keep it loose. "Back when we tracked Saren, we went to this volcanic world, Therum, to rescue Liara T'Soni. At least there was a little cut out road for Shepard to drive the Mako through, but we were always too close for comfort. I remember geth firing at us and the Mako flipping over. We landed right over the edge of a lava patch. Little closer than I had liked."

That had been the first mission he went on with Shepard outside of the Citadel. Certainly a way to make a first impression.

Kasumi stared up at him inquisitively, her legs crossing. "So she was really like this from the very beginning?"

"Are you guys talking about Shepard's driving?" It was Tali's turn to enter undetected, taking a seat beside Kasumi.

"What else? It's just like old times, Tali," Garrus greeted his quarian friend.

"That certainly was a constant topic of conversation after a mission," Tali remembered with a certain sense of fondness. Tali had once expressed to him how she missed being on the old Normandy, with all its old faces. At least Chakwas and Joker were here as well, but she had been right. It would never be the same.

Kasumi stopped rubbing her arm, lowering it beside her. "So you guys went in the Mako for every mission?"

"Anything not on the Citadel. We were mostly on planets with mountain terrain. Lots and lots of mountains. And Shepard always wanting to drive up the mountain inside of going around it. And then launching the Mako off the mountain, only rarely with a smooth landing."

"Not always mountains. You weren't on that highway on Feros, turning on our side only inches away from tumbling off the edge through the clouds. Why did they have to build everything so high?" Tali let out a nervous laugh. "Keelah, I'd never been so scared in my life. I really thought Liara and I were going to die."

"You didn't get stuck on a mountain trail on Noveria during a snowstorm. Thought we'd have to get out and push the Mako the rest of the way. Or worse, walk. Don't know how well that would have worked. With geth every few feet away, might have been a problem." It had made him cold just seeing the snow blowing outside the windows of Port Hanshan.

"Guess it's true what they saw about turians and cold," Kasumi remarked. He swore she could see the hint of a smirk on her lips.

"Have you ever noticed most of our colonies are places with warmer climates? Not much for ice planets."

"At it again? That takes me back." Garrus was proud to say he didn't jump when Joker's voice resonated through the room, but he did flinch at the sudden noise from nowhere.

"Spying on us as usual, Joker?" Garrus called back.

"You know it. Got to have something to do while piloting the ship. Talking about Shepard?" Joker asked even when he knew the answer.

"Just trading some stories from the SR-1."

"Tell them about Ilos," Joker insisted, barely containing his excitement. "That was a fun one, wasn't it?"

"Racing against time to head right into a mass relay, driving through narrow Prothean ruins while avoiding geth rockets? What wouldn't be fun about that?"

"Let's not forget your trustworthy pilot dropping you guys off in style with a near-impossible drop."

"We all appreciated it, Joker," Tali said, amused.

"It really is kinda surprising. Shep always seems so controlled," Kasumi remarked.

"Don't see the problem. She's always so uptight. Nice to see her let loose." Was that friendly concern Garrus detected coming from Jack?

"Give her some credit, though. No one's ever been killed or seriously injured under her watch. She'd hate that to happen." Joker's voice had turned serious, one of the few times Garrus had heard that type of tone from him. Was he referring to the crew or himself, who Shepard had refused to leave behind as the SR-1 crumbled apart?

Joker did have a point, not really seriously thinking about it in that light before (even after all the times Shepard defended herself with the same argument). Even as crazed as she got driving, even if people suffered the occasional bruise or sore ligament, Shepard's kind heart would never let her continue if someone seriously suffered because of it. Her reaction to Garrus slamming his shoulder into the car door was proof of that. And now that he thought about it, that hadn't been the only time she'd asked after him or others.

"Yeah. She'd never forgive herself if something happened because of her," Garrus agreed with Joker. "Scaring the crap out of us is one thing, but that's another. Maybe she's more in control than she lets on. Would certainly explain a lot."

Someone cleared their throat by the door, announcing their presence to the group. The presence of their commander, leaning against the doorway, taking in the startled (and in Jack's case extremely amused) faces of her teammates.

They really needed to put some type of bell or alarm over the doors on the ship.

"She came in, didn't she?" When Joker didn't get an answer, he conveniently thought he heard EDI asking him about something, even though they all would have clearly heard her asking being right in the cockpit.

"And just for the record, Commander, I don't condone talking about my superior officer behind her back." He promptly shut off the com before he received a reply.

"Shepard! We were just talking about you."

Shepard cocked her head at Tali's greeting, studying them all with cool eyes, but Garrus saw her lips twitching in an attempt to keep herself from bursting into laughter. "I noticed."

"You're busted, Vakarian," Jack jeered at Garrus.

The satisfied look that suddenly manifested on Shepard's face affected him more than Jack's jeer.

She straightened herself from the doorway, approaching him with light steps, close enough he could reach out and brush back the few strands that had fallen across her flushed face. "You do realize with that admission, Garrus, that you've lost any possible leverage, right?"

He recognized that look. It was the same one she got when she lured that asari trying to buy that bar on Illium into a false sense of security, the sly smile on Shepard's face reveling in her success.

She hadn't won that easily. She underestimated his powers of persuasion. "I'm sure I can find ways to gain it back." He hadn't meant for that to come out as suggestively as it did. Hopefully no one besides Shepard noticed.

"I'm sure you will," she replied with the same tone. Her face then shifted into a sheepish expression, as if she realized there were other people in the room.

Jack looked ready to say something. Something inappropriate judging by the smug smile on her face, but Kasumi jumped in. "So what brings you over here, Shep? Checking on us? Listening to us gossip about you?"

"Just sharing a drink with Dr. Chakwas." Shepard walked behind the bar, two small glasses hanging by her fingertips. "Need some glasses."

"That's really nice of you, Shep. Can't imagine many go in and out of her office except for medical treatment."

Shepard walked back to the doorway, but not before brushing against Garrus as she went by, that brief touch sending a warm tingling through his body.

"Carry on." She kept her gaze fixed on Garrus the longest, her dark irises filled with an almost hypnotic glow that sent his heart thumping, her lips curved in a small smile he knew was directed more at him, just to drive him crazy.

For the uumpth time, he found himself wondering how her plump lips would feel on the underside of his jaw, his throat, her damp tongue running along the sensitive areas underneath his fringe, her small hands running over his body and finding the spaces between his plates...

Jack let out a low whistle, dragging him away from that growing daydream, a dream he was more and more anxious for to become reality. "Never knew Shepard was into boning birds."

"Jack! Keelah!" Tali cried, covering her eyes with her hand. If her helmet wasn't on, Garrus was sure they'd see the slow blush creeping onto her cheeks.

"What?" Jack poured herself another shot. "They're practically drooling over each other."

"Charming, Jack." Garrus was still too flustered to think of a real witty comeback. Had they really been that obvious?

"Thought so." She downed her drink as quickly as the last, slamming the shot-glass onto the bar counter and heading to the door. "Later. And tell Shepard I wanna know if turians are a better lay than humans. You know, when you finally get around to it."

"Keelah, that's more than I needed to know," Tali muttered again, shaking her head at Jack's coarseness.

She then turned to Garrus. "I knew it, though. I could totally see this coming!" Tali reached out and placed a hand on his arm. "I'm really happy for you two."

Apparently she had seen more than he had. At least consciously, the thought of engaging in anything like this with Shepard never crossed his mind in the old days. He respected her, saw her as a friend, sure, but nothing beyond that. After her sudden death, he had just wanted to honor her memory.

His feelings for her, which he still had to sort out, had only developed since Omega, when he saw the N7 insignia on her armor through his scope. He had been sure he was hallucinating, hopped up on stims. Then there was she, making clean headshots beside him. Just like old times.

She had saved him that day. Ever since, his feelings towards her had started to develop into something much deeper.

"Thanks, Tali," Garrus said, rubbing at his neck, something he did whenever he was nervous.

He didn't really want to get into how nothing physical had happened between them other than that kiss. They hadn't really spent that much time together outside missions lately (they had both been busy with one thing or another), giving them no real chance to talk about where they wanted all this to go. If this was maybe what he hoped, something more than being friends with benefits, blowing off steam. Sure she had said she wanted him, someone she could trust, but that could mean a number of things.

Tali didn't stick around too much longer, citing her need to head back to engineering, leaving Garrus alone again with Kasumi.

"So you knew about it too, then?" He realized now that's what she had been smiling at him like that for. She must have overheard something or saw the looks Shepard and him had been giving each other lately when they thought no one was looking.

"Scuttlebutt's been touting that for awhile." Garrus let out a low groan. So much for disrupting the crew as little as possible. "But I didn't really need anyone to tell me. When you're a thief, you tend to blend. And notice what others miss. What people try to keep hidden behind a mask, but is really so clear on their faces." Kasumi's voice turned soft. "You know, Shep really likes you."

His throat suddenly felt dry, preventing him from swallowing. His heart started pounding in his chest again and he could feel his faceplates tighten beyond his control. "Did she...say anything to you?"

"She didn't need to. Trust me, Garrus, she cares a lot about you. Treasure your time with her while you have it."

He couldn't see Kasumi's face or eyes, but the regret in her voice was unmistakable, clearly lost in a memory of someone who once, maybe still, meant something to her.

"I will." He had no intention of squandering this chance with Shepard, no matter how many times he questioned how it had happened to someone like him or how long Shepard wanted this for. All he knew is nothing would keep him away from her.

"Glad to hear it," Kasumi said, meaning every word of it. "I think you both need each other."

Kasumi's words still rang in his head even after he left the room, heading back to the Main Battery. On his way there, he spotted Shepard through the window, pouring a glass of brandy for Dr. Chakwas. When she looked back up and saw his eyes resting on her, she shot a small smile that crinkled at the edges of her mouth and lit up her entire face, even with the med-bay's synthetic light overhead of her.

Spirits, she was beautiful.

He smiled back at her before continuing onto the battery, to try and focus on optimizing firing algorithms for the third time that day.


	3. Part 3

-3-

"Warning. The VI infection has assumed control of the geth cannon," the Hammerhead VI announced to the three occupants who watched as the geth cannon focused on the Hammerhead.

"Shepard, you can move anytime now!" Tali cried out in a panic when a red targeting field surrounded them and one of the shielded generators. She was already on edge from their journey to Vulcan station, the geothermal plant built around rivers of molten lava. They had had enough close calls with hopping off crumbling rock piles on said rivers of lava to last a lifetime.

"We'll be fine, Tali, don't worry." Shepard's hand was already on the throttle and they jettisoned forward as the cannon fired a precise pulse at its supposed target.

How many times had they heard that in a dangerously close to claustrophobic vehicle with Shepard at the wheel?

"Remind me how I got roped into this again?" Tali groaned, rubbing at her knee she had banged into the back of Shepard's seat earlier.

"The same way I convinced Garrus. With excessive amounts of charm." Shepard fired at the nearby defense shield around another generator.

"In much different ways," Tali replied, shooting a knowing glance at Garrus. What did Tali expect? That he'd blurt out some kisses on Shepard's part on his lips, his jaw, the insides of his mandibles were involved to lure him?

"Plus you get the opportunity to kill more geth," Shepard threw out as another incentive.

"True, but I'd prefer to kill geth not possessed by a human-synthetic hybrid."

"Warning. Geth cannon is locking on our location."

Shepard veered the Hammerhead to the right to avoid being torn apart.

Garrus had to admit the whole situation was strange. A top Cerberus researcher's brother had volunteered to link up to the geth network in an attempt to control them. Then as all these types of crazy experiments go that look good on paper, everything went horribly wrong.

Garrus had yet to let go of the edge of the bench seat, knowing the moment he did he'd be thrown about. He wouldn't until the geth cannon was destroyed. Though he was actually willing to give Shepard a pass this time on her creative driving moves. She didn't have a lot of room to maneuver gracefully with a geth cannon tracking their every move.

Either that or he was getting soft.

The VI issued yet another warning, forcing Shepard to utilize the jump function while speeding forward, Garrus and Tali lifting off the bench seat before slamming back down. Good thing Garrus was in hard armor. The same could not be said for Tali, if her loud curse a moment later was an indication. Her enviro-seat could only cushion the landing so much.

"Keelah, are we close to lowering the shield?"

"The cannon destroyed this generator's shields. We keep its attention, let it do all the work for us."

Shepard proved her point when the red webbing of the targeting laser appeared around them again. They sped out of the way of the blast in one piece. The same could not be said for the generator, but the cannon's defense shield was now only at 75%.

"Alright, cannon, you want more? You gotta work for it!"

"I don't think the cannon can hear you, Shepard. Even if it did, it wouldn't understand trash talk."

He could feel her glaring at him even though she was staring straight ahead and he couldn't see it. "Not the point, Garrus."

Before they knew it (much to his and Tali's relief), Shepard had successfully navigated over the bumpy, rocky landscape, one generator away from having access to the geth cannon.

Shepard positioned the Hammerhead right near the last uncovered generator, hand hovering over the throttle, twitching in anticipation.

"Warning. We are being targeted."

The geth cannon gave them less time to escape the blast, like it knew its defenses were crumbling and was increasing its resistance. The force of the resulting blast tossed them to the left towards a cliff wall at a dangerously high speed, causing Tali to practically fall on top of Garrus.

"Never knew you felt that way, Tali, but my interest lies elsewhere."

Tali smacked his shoulder in response. "You can be such a bosh'tet, Garrus."

"I try."

Shepard let out a loud puff of air. "Not expecting the cannon to target us that quickly."

Garrus righted himself back up. "Getting a little slow there, Shepard?"

"Shield disabled. You may now target the geth cannon."

Shepard positioned the Hammerhead in prime range of the geth cannon, slamming her hand down on the button to fire her own shots at the cannon until it exploded in a sea of metal specks.

"No further threats detected. Entry to the ship is now clear."

Shepard turned back to him with raised eyebrows at the VI's declaration. "You were saying, Vakarian?"

"You got lucky."

Shepard brought the Hammerhead to a standstill once they arrived on the metal platform leading to the supposedly dormant geth ship. She was the first one out, throwing him a look he knew was meant just for him. "In more ways than one." Her excited eyes spoke of what was to come between them, how much she was looking forward to that moment.

The look disappeared as quickly as it came, the look of the Commander on an important mission taking control, but it still got Garrus's heart going to see it for one brief moment.

He shook his head. Now wasn't the time to get distracted. They had a mission. Stop a crazed hybrid VI from taking over the galaxy.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Tali shaking her head, facepalming her mask, covering her eyes. "Get a room already."

* * *

Being around dinnertime back on the Normandy, the mess hall was filled to the brim with different members of the crew who only came together during meals. Garrus spotted Miranda leaning against a wall beside Jacob, who was scarfing down some type of sandwich, crumbs falling carelessly to the chrome floor. She pounced on Garrus and Tali the moment she spotted the two rounding the corner.

"Did Shepard get my message about the Illusive Man wanting to talk to her about Project Overlord?"

"Yeah, she got it," Garrus replied, not saying Shepard did not look pleased, to say the least, when she saw it on the ride back. Or rely to Miranda the few choice words Shepard had for the man.

"Good." At least Miranda had the decency to look a little guilty at having to make Shepard talk to him.

How the hell could the Illusive Man possibly know about what happened down there that quickly, anyways? Was he monitoring his messages 24/7? He did remember Shepard sending some message to Miranda while they guarded Gavin Archer as a shuttle came and retrieved his brother David to take him to Grissom Academy, just in case Archer tried to prevent it, but that couldn't have been more than two hours ago.

A Cerberus shuttle was apparently going to come for Archer later, but Shepard hadn't cared about sticking around to wait until he was picked up. She had honestly looked like she couldn't give two shits whether Gavin Archer stayed on Aite to rot. Garrus had rarely seen her so angry or disgusted.

She hadn't explained what exactly happened when Tali and Garrus were separated from her, but whatever she had seen had both shaken her and left her spitting fire at Archer. If how they found David hooked up to that machine was any indication, Garrus could take an educated guess that David Archer had had no say in participating in the experiment (like Archer had claimed) and Archer had forced him into it, indirectly causing the disaster they had stumbled upon.

Garrus tried not to remember that moment when the VI had taken control of Shepard, the eerier pale green glow of her eyes where there only should have been blue, the door locking behind her as she was led out of the room like her limbs were completely out of her control, both he and Tali frantically trying to get the door open so they could provide back-up.

The feeling of panic when that door had blocked her from his view had not been a pleasant one, one he had never felt before, one he hoped he wouldn't feel again, but knowing full well he would. This was Shepard they were talking about. She threw herself into dangerous situations at least twice a day. And he wouldn't have her any other way.

"So how did the mission go? Riding in the Hammerhead go ok?" Jacob asked, taking a healthy bite of his sandwich.

"As well as can be expected. With lava and geth cannons," Garrus replied.

A new voice from the mess hall table entered the conversation, who was busy cutting into a healthy piece of meat. "Sounds like some fun."

Tali's eyes lit up in glare directed at Zaeed, as if daring him to say it was fun once he had done it. "Then maybe you should have volunteered to go."

"I would have gone, if you didn't have the balls," Grunt added from across the table, finishing with a low chuckle and going back to gnawing at his own slab of meat.

Zaeed banged his hand holding his fork against the table, but it was barely heard over the roar of the different conversations in the mess. "Hey, I got balls bigger and older than yours, junior. While you were in your precious tank, I was kicking around batarians and in days long chases with mercs employed by some smart-ass salarian who thought hired muscle would be enough to save him." He let out a dark and satisfied chortle. "Guess he didn't count on someone as stubborn as me."

"I wouldn't have thought you'd be in any hurry to go on another mission with Shepard," Miranda commented. "It sounded like things got tense on that mission on Zorya."

"I've put it behind me, long enough to get your mission done, anyways," Zaeed grumbled, though he still sounded unhappy about the outcome of his personal mission. "Not like I had much of a choice."

The talk of that mission had definitely been less about the Hammerhead and more about Zaeed facing the wrath of two angry and stubborn women in the forms of Shepard and Samara when he had suggested leaving Vido Santiago's hostages to be burned alive.

One of the women in question was nearby, carrying her own dinner consisting of a hearty bowl of soup back to the starboard observatory to take her meal in peace. But she paused by the table, probably overhearing the conversation.

"I always put the lives of the innocent before anything else," her serene voice floated into the air. "The code demands it and I must obey, no matter the objections from others." Her disdain for him was plain for all to see.

"You know, beautiful, I kind of like that about you, that certainty of yours," Zaeed said, eying Samara's form from top to bottom, leaving no illusions of his interest in her. Samara did not reply, but met his gaze with a cold reserve, yet it also held a ferocity, warning Zaeed of a line he dare not cross. Instead of looking threatened, he looked even more smug, like he saw it as a personal challenge to make her like him.

"So, anyways, back to Shepard. Just the usual with her crazy driving moves," Tali interrupted, unable to hide how flustered she was at Zaeed shamelessly hitting on Samara. She really did get flustered a lot, Garrus realized.

"Good to know," Jacob replied, finishing his dinner and walking away to hand off his dirty plate to Gardner, ending up getting roped into a conversation with the man.

"I don't understand what the big deal is," Zaeed declared, having looked away from Samara and turned his attention back to his food.

"Sadly I must agree with Zaeed. Shepard has proven herself an honorable woman who cares about those under her command. That is all that should matter," Samara replied.

Miranda crossed her arms. "Her driving definitely does matter. You've seen how she behaves behind the wheel. If she isn't more careful, she's going to get either herself or others seriously hurt…or worse." The words sounded harsh, but Garrus heard the concern behind them, more than that of someone just protecting an investment. Maybe Shepard had been right about Miranda. Or he really was going soft.

"Bah! It's all part of the fight," Grunt argued between chews.

Miranda was not pleased by the response. "Course you'd say that. You showed off that scrape to your arm you got in the Hammerhead like it was some battle trophy."

"That's what it feels like sometimes afterwards," Tali said. "Especially after surviving the Mako doing flips."

"Talking about me again? Am I really that horrible?"

Shepard had rounded the corner without anyone noticing, still clad in full N7 armor. Garrus sometimes wondered if she used tactical cloak on more than just the battlefield. Sneaking up on people seemed like a craft to her. One of the nearby ensigns offered her a salute while juggling her cup, dinner plate, and silverware in both hands.

Rather than answering the question, Miranda asked her how her talk with Mr. Illusive (as Shepard sometimes liked to call him) went. Shepard's eyes darkened and a deep frown crossed her face, as well as frown lines appearing on her forehead. Not a look Garrus liked seeing.

"He fed me some honeyed words about how he didn't condone Archer's work, but trying to guilt trip me by saying David Archer was unique and I've set efforts to understand the geth back several years."

"I certainly don't condone it either, Shepard, but he does have a point."

Shepard's frown only got deeper. "After what I saw done to David Archer, the price of that knowledge was too high. Besides," she said, trying to shake away her frown and lighten the mood. "Why use a human test subject when we have our own talking geth?"

"Your confidence in our abilities is appreciated, Shepard-Commander, though quite unexpected." Legion had popped out from the AI core. Strange since as a synthetic, the concepts of dinnertime or socializing were meaningless to him.

Garrus caught a glimpse of Tali recoiling at the sight of the geth before forcing herself to calm down, remember that this geth was not hostile. At least for the moment.

Tali was not the only one who stopped whatever it was they were doing and stare at Legion like it was a new exotic animal on a safari tour.

"Legion. You don't usually leave the AI core. Need something?" Shepard asked, giving her full attention to the geth. No matter organic or synthetic, she always gave anyone on her crew the time of day.

"We have discovered the location of the quantum storage device containing the heretic virus. Indications show they will not waste time uploading the virus. We have no more than a day to stop its release."

Garrus had no idea what Legion was talking about, but at least Shepard seemed to. "Send the coordinates to the galaxy map. We'll take care of it, Legion," she assured him. "I won't let the heretics brainwash your people."

Tali made a sound between a choked gasp and a cough, her bright eyes boring into Shepard. Shepard sent Tali a look that clearly said to not say a word. Tali nodded, but judging by her tense posture, she wasn't completely placated. Garrus doubted that would change anytime soon.

"We will begin preparations. And Shepard-Commander, we recommend traveling from the ship to the station in the Kodiak vehicle. This platform would be at a higher risk of critical shut-down riding in the Hammerhead vehicle."

It took every ounce of self-control to fight back the snicker threatening to erupt from him. That even got a smile (he thought) out of Tali. And he was pretty sure he saw Miranda trying to hide a smirk.

"Got it, Legion," Shepard said, letting it roll off her. "Send me everything you have about the heretics and the station."

"And me too." Garrus wasn't expecting to hear Tali volunteer herself so soon after this trying mission they had just gone through. "I've got your back, Shepard, if anything goes wrong."

Shepard gave Tali a grateful smile, no hint of the frown or the warning, stern glance she had sent Tali from before. "I appreciate that, Tali."

"Of course, Creator Tali'Zorah."

Legion left to go back to the AI core. Samara slipped quietly away back to the observatory, with Miranda also excusing herself to go back into her office.

"Well, guess I better get dinner, could be a long night preparing. And…" Tali massaged her knee as she walked to the counter, "putting some salve on."

"Not a bad idea. Shepard?"

Shepard shook her head. "I'm just going to go up to my cabin, get out of this damn armor."

"You sure?" He didn't know what was coming over him, the need to push like this. She was an adult and could make her own decisions, but he couldn't help himself. "It's been a long day, you really should have something."

He was half-expecting her to put up more of a fight (he knew first-hand how stubborn she could be when she wanted to be), but she let out a wearied sigh, allowing him to see the fatigue pressed into the lines of her face. "If you insist. But could you bring it up to me? I really want to get this armor off."

"I think I can manage that."

Shepard told him what she wanted (just a grilled cheese sandwich with sliced tomatoes, simple enough for him to remember). As she passed by him on the way to the elevator, she laid a hand on his forearm, squeezing it in thanks.

"She's got you wrapped around her pretty little finger, Vakarian," Zaeed stated when Shepard was out of earshot. He certainly was not one for subtlety. At least he was better than Jack. She took bluntness to a whole new level.

"Don't really see the problem with that," Garrus said, unflustered. He really didn't mind doing things for her, after everything she had done for him. Getting her a sandwich was the least he could. He also had no doubt if it was him in her position, she'd be doing the same thing.

Zaeed offered a shrug, attention once again back on finishing his dinner. "Suppose I don't either."

Garrus didn't know whether to take that as a compliment or not. But it didn't matter. He had a levo-based sandwich to get from Gardner and he was not about to keep Shepard waiting.


	4. Part 4

-4-

"There you go. Should reduce inflammation in less than hour. Come to me if still feeling discomfort." Mordin practically shoved the pill bottle into Garrus's hands.

It had only been two weeks after the suicide mission, which with Shepard, hadn't turned out to be much of one. Everyone had somehow made it out alive, either due to some divine presence, stroke of major luck, or Shepard's leadership skills. Either way, it was a major win. And they stopped the Collectors from finishing that Reaper-human hybrid prototype. What those colonists must have gone through before they were melted into goo. And they even officially cut off ties with the Illusive Man and Cerberus. All in all, a productive day.

Though his ribs still felt sore as hell. Had that platform he had slammed into (and the debris that had smacked into him) really bruised him that badly?

He uncapped the bottle and swallowed one of the tiny capsules down. "Appreciate it, Mordin." He would have gone to Dr. Chakwas, but it was late and he didn't want to disturb her, especially when she still seemed a little shaken by being abducted by the Collectors. He would have just suffered until morning when he remembered Mordin mentioning he was something of a night-owl, as humans called it, whatever an owl was.

Mordin waved away the gratitude. "Welfare of patients top priority. Have to say surprised weren't coming down here for something else. How late it is. Thought maybe had adverse reaction to Shepard. Maybe…" he cleared his throat of a lump that was not there. "Ingested?"

Garrus rubbed his neck, feeling his mandibles flap uncontrollably. He still couldn't get over those pamphlets Mordin had forwarded to him and how…detailed some of them were, just at first glance.

Garrus fought back a smile thinking back to the night before the suicide mission. As much sexual tension as there had been leading up to it that almost drove him crazy, waiting had definitely been worth it.

He could never remember a time when he was more nervous in his life, even if he had tried to act like he knew what the hell he was doing, with the wine, and the music similar to the kind from Flux with its mindless, pulsing beat, and the compliments.

Ok, maybe the compliments were where he began to unravel. Saying her waist was very supportive, maybe not the smoothest thing he's ever said. He had begun babbling, hoping that he hadn't offended her with some societal stereotype that was common knowledge to humans, his nervousness showing by the second. But then, she took pity on him, forcing him to slow down, take a steadying breath before the plunge.

He had admitted it, then. How much he wanted this, whatever _this_ was, to go right. Just once in his life.

Then she reached her hand up to stroke his scarred plates, pure tenderness and empathy on her face, and he was lost.

What passed next was a blur of gentle touches, hesitant first embraces, but they became more brazen, wanting to experiment, determine what the other liked. But nothing compared to the moment when he was finally inside her, moving as one as naturally as if they had been together for years. And when they both came down from their highs, her curled up against his body, his arms around her, it just felt _right._

"We've been careful," Garrus finally answered, drawing himself out of the memories.

Unfortunately for Garrus, Mordin was just warming up. "Diagrams and instructional vids of use, I take it? No extreme chaffing on her part?"

Maybe they had gone at it a little rougher once they were cleared of the med-bay after the suicide mission, letting out the stress from those last few hours and the intense relief at having both made it out relatively in one piece. Maybe there had been a few scratches, bites, and chafed areas come morning (not to mention his body screaming in protest from the overly-vigorous movements), but damned if he'd be the one to tell Mordin that.

"Excellent. Good stress relief for humans and turians. Might need after everything that's happened." Mordin sucked in a gulp of air through his nostrils. "Still not satisfied with her psychological evaluation."

Garrus couldn't bring himself to argue with that. No sooner had they come back through the Omega-4 relay, Hackett contacted Shepard. Said one of his top researchers, Dr. Amanda Kenson, had critical information and possible proof of an imminent Reaper invasion. Thing was she had been arrested by the batarians. So Hackett wanted Shepard to go in and rescue her alone.

Garrus could never remember being as frustrated, bordering on angered, with Shepard as he had been when she told him. They had just survived this suicide mission and now she wanted to tempt fate so shortly after? Without any backup?

She had tried to be as patient with him as she could, but even the paragon of the galaxy had her limits when people tried to tell her how to do things. He had finally relented, knowing deep down he couldn't stop her, that it was probably going to be a routine rescue mission and he was worrying too much, but she had left the ship with tension between them he had never felt with her before.

He hadn't really started to worry until a day went by and they had heard absolutely nothing. The only thing EDI could track was her leaving Aratoht in a shuttle, presumably with Kenson, and then nothing.

Two days he had been forced to wait, not knowing where she was or what could have possibly happened to her. He knew she could handle herself, he never doubted that, but, but, but. He couldn't help but worry.

When she had finally contacted Joker, finally made it back on board, he was fully intent on tearing into her for agreeing to go alone, making him pace the floors for two days. All of that had faded away when he took one look at her in the med-bay, how deflated she seemed. There was a deep regret in her beautiful blue eyes that had sucked the brightness and life out of them. This wasn't Commander Shepard, the larger than life soldier, he was looking at it. This was just Jane Shepard the woman who sat hunched over, an unknown weight practically pressing down on her shoulders.

Instead, he had held her, listened as she told him what she had done. Three hundred thousand plus batarians dead to delay the Reapers. Hackett had warned her she would have to head back to Earth when summoned, though he didn't know when. He had promised he would delay it for as long as he could.

Garrus had wanted to tell her it wasn't her fault, and her actions had been necessary, but something told him she didn't want to hear that. So he had just continued to hold her until she had been ready to go back to her cabin to get some rest.

Mordin stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Would also dissuade her from driving, if we go on any other missions before called back to Earth. After first-hand experience, driving not advisable in her current emotional state. Launched off multiple rock edges with barely enough room to land. Lots of jostling around involved." He sucked in more air. "Problematic then. Would be even more so now."

Shepard was bad enough when she was in a good mood. Garrus didn't even want to think about what might happen when she was a mix of depressed and pissed off (emotions that had no business being associated with Shepard). He knew she had a rock-solid level of self-control, but she had been through a lot of high-stress situations in such a short amount of time.

"I'll be sure to step in, Mordin."

"Good to hear. Anyway, must get back to studying Collector sample tissue from Collector Base. Fascinating finds, could learn so much." His eyes brightened as if in remembrance. "Forwarded other tissue samples to Helos before jump through relay. Hope they arrive in time to be of some use."

That was good to hear. Even if Garrus couldn't be there for her like his sister wanted him to, there was no way he wouldn't try to do something, anything, for his mother.

Garrus quietly thanked Mordin again, darting out the door before Mordin parted him with some more words of wisdom regarding him and Shepard.

With it being so late, there was hardly anyone milling around the CIC. Thankfully Kelly had retired for the evening. Not that he didn't like her, but being the ship's unofficial psychiatrist, as well as Shepard's assistant, he wouldn't have put it past her to ask about his feelings, gauge his own emotional levels. Though she didn't seem like her same chipper self last he saw her. Probably still reeling from her time trapped in that Collector pod.

The crew deck was the same way, with the lights dimmed and only Thane Krios sitting at the common table, drinking a steaming hot liquid from a green cup. That was unusual. Garrus never saw him spend any time outside of life support.

"Thane," Garrus acknowledged. He hadn't trusted Thane when he first arrived on the Normandy. Though Garrus couldn't help admire his abilities as a sniper (being something of a sniper enthusiast, after all), he couldn't easily forget that Thane had been an assassin for a living, even if Thane was completely different from any assassin he had ever encountered. But when they fought together in that Collector base, covered each other's backs on multiple missions, Garrus found himself thinking of him less and less as an assassin but as a brother-in-arms.

Thane bowed his own head in greeting. "Garrus. I'm surprised you're not with Shepard," he replied, taking note of the heavy armor and visor Garrus still wore. Items that would have been long gone if he had gone up to Shepard's cabin.

"You too?" Almost all of the squadmates had made some comment about Shepard and him. He'd really lose it if Legion started asking about their relationship one of these days.

Thane blinked at him. "My apologies for prying, but it is no secret your strong...attachment for each other. You are fortunate. Shepard is a strong woman, a true Siha."

Garrus cocked his head. "A what?"

"One of the warrior-angels of the goddess Arashu. Fierce in wrath, a tenacious protector."

Why was he telling Garrus this? Was that affection Garrus's heightened hearing detected?

Thane took a moment to sip from his mug, avoiding the jagged crack on the edge. "Do not be concerned. Even if I wished to, she would refuse my advances, for her eyes are solely set on you. But I consider her a friend and I confess I'm concerned about her."

Good to know Garrus wasn't the only one. Hard not to notice the change in her since her return. She had only done rounds once a day, choosing to stay in her cabin most of the day. She had only checked in with Garrus for about a minute. Two minutes in total in two days. Maybe he should have gone up to her cabin, demanded she talk to him, but he had wanted to give her time to come to terms with everything that had happened. Give her space.

"Why? Did she tell you something?"

"I was passing through the CIC earlier today and overheard her asking Yeoman Chambers to scan for nearby planets she could find minerals on. I assume she means to go down in the Hammerhead."

Thane bowed his head again, his eyes dilating as he entered his solipsistic state. "We land on Kopis, diving through the air like a bird snatching food from the ground. Bullets, rockets, and cannon pulses fire at us. The floor beneath our feet shakes when the Hammerhead fires back. We hop onto another rock, bouncing off the seats like an infant being tossed into the air to land in his parent's arms. The kinetic barrier is down. We soar off the cliff edge towards the dig site. Mordin sits beside me, muttering the word "problematic" until we slam to the ground, the vertigo in my head not entirely disappearing even once we stop."

That sort-of answered the question of what Thane thought when his turn came to ride in the Hammerhead for the mission on Kopis in that Prothean ruin to find Dr. Cayce.

But Garrus was too busy trying to figure out why Shepard would feel like driving that thing over dangerous terrain given her current state was a sound idea.

"Normally I would not mention it, but given what's happened and how she looked when she passed through here earlier..."

Garrus abruptly cut him off. "You saw her? How long ago was this?"

"Not too long. She was heading back to the elevator when I came out. Don't know where she was coming from."

Thane's pupils suddenly widened, slipping into another memory. "Shepard's head is bowed, the weight of the world crushing her. Doesn't make any attempt to speak to me, stares straight at the floor. So unlike the woman I've come to know. She enters the elevator. Her name is on my lips, a small sound echoing in the silent hallway. She finally looks up. Sapphire eyes that shine like stars on a dark canvas now look haunted, those of a woman burdened with regret and pain. The elevator door closes before I can call out again, the finite sound ringing in my ears."

Spirits, what had Garrus been thinking, leaving her alone? He should have known she wouldn't let the blame on herself go so easily, not with that many deaths she believed were on her hands. He was just about to sprint to the elevator to go to her cabin when he was stalled by a disembodied voice announcing herself to the two.

"Apologies for interrupting, but given the nature of your conversation, I thought Officer Vakarian should be made aware of Shepard's presence in the docking bay. She is preparing to launch down to Taitus."

Garrus barely got out a "thank you" to EDI, barely heard Thane urging him to go. All he could focus on was getting to the elevator, getting down to the hangar to stop Shepard before she snuck away.

Out of all the things Cerberus had improved with the SR-2, they hadn't deemed changing the speed of the elevator a necessity, a fact Garrus was cursing them to the end of time for.

Shepard had dressed into her N7 armor (at least her senses hadn't completely left her) and was just about to enter the Hammerhead when the elevator door finally opened, Garrus practically bolting out.

"Shepard!"

He had never seen Shepard appear as startled as she did now, almost tumbling off the Hammerhead if not for steadying herself at the last minute.

"Garrus."

She squared her shoulders and set her jaw, her face a mask of stoicism. Except for her eyes. As he approached her, he could see it, a glimpse of raw emotion and pain she was trying so hard to hide. He cursed himself even more for leaving her alone as long as he had.

"What are you doing?"

She crossed her arms, as if daring him to challenge her. "What does it look like I'm doing?"

"I would say it looks like you're going down in the Hammerhead in the middle of the night, but that couldn't be. You have more sense than that."

"Need to stock pile on minerals for upgrades for the crew and ship. I don't know when I'm going to be ordered to return to Earth and I was still up. Figured might as well do it now," Shepard said, not missing a beat.

Garrus quickly bridged the gap between him and the Hammerhead. "When you could easily get more from scanning at the galaxy map? And going without telling anyone? That's not like you."

Shepard didn't bother disguising the irritated frown she shot his way. "I don't need a god-damn babysitter, Garrus. It's my ship. I go off and on it whenever I want."

This was her emotions making her act like this, turning her into a renegade when she was a paragon with renegade moments. She could be stubborn, but not this abrasive. This wasn't Jane Shepard. _His_ Shepard.

Shepard reached for the handle of the hatch, it opening with a drawn out creaking sound. "So why'd you come down here, Garrus? Stop me from going?"

"Given the circumstances..."

"Why?" He didn't like how eerily calm she had suddenly become. "Because of Aratoht? I'm fine."

Garrus didn't believe her for a second, not with all the evidence to the contrary.

"Shepard, we're in Taitus's orbit," EDI informed her. Was it Garrus's imagination or did even EDI sound a little concerned at Shepard's behavior?

"Thanks, EDI." Shepard hovered over the opening of the Hammerhead, waiting for Garrus to say something, make some attempt to stop her. When he didn't say a word, she climbed into the hold, closing the hatch behind her.

He knew then he wouldn't be able to convince her not to go, not when she could be so stubborn. Maybe it would be ok, but Garrus couldn't shake the unease he felt in the pit of his stomach. His gut was telling him letting her go alone would not end well.

_"If she isn't more careful, she's going to get either herself or others seriously hurt…or worse."_

Miranda's words would not easily leave him, nor would they the entire time she was gone.

He had to do it _._

He opened the hatch, climbing in behind her. She spun around in her front seat, surprise written on her face, but they didn't say anything to each other, understanding perfectly where the other stood.

Shepard powered up the Hammerhead, the VI coming online and greeting the two, completely unaware of the tension between them, while Garrus latched onto the leather seat, physically and mentally prepping himself.

* * *

Garrus could sense the immediate difference in Shepard when she launched the Hammerhead off the edge of a rocky cliff to get across a gorge. Launching a vehicle off things like it was a pebble in a slingshot was nothing new, nor was the rough landing, but he could just _feel_ it. How she jerked the wheel when landing, like she wasn't really in control. She wasn't doing these risky things because she got a thrill out of them and knew with unwavering certainty she would come out fine, but because... he didn't want to think about what she was trying to do.

She was also being unusually quiet, when she should have been teasing him about his reaction to her driving. Teasing him about something, anything. He hadn't heard her laugh once.

He really, really missed hearing her warm laugh so full of life.

"Shepard, slow down. You can't be hitting your head any more times, you'll have nothing left in there!" Garrus tried to call to her when she bonked her head on the roof for the fourth time, but he wasn't sure if she was ignoring him or honestly hadn't heard him because of their drilling for iridium.

"Should just be a few more," Shepard informed him, commanding the VI to set the nav point for the next mineral pile.

"Shepard, I really think you need to stop," Garrus said, leaning forward on his seat. From that vantage point, he could see the waves of tension rolling off her.

"I don't. It feels good to be off the ship for awhile."

"Shepard," he pressed, more of a warning in his voice, a low growl in his lower flang. He was this close to prying her away from the seat before she hurt herself even more.

"I don't want to hear it, Vakarian. I didn't twist your arm to come with me."

He clutched her shoulder in a vice grip. "Stop the damn Hammerhead, Shepard," he ordered her firmly.

Shepard tried wrenching his hand off, but he wouldn't let go. "No."

"Don't make me pull you out of that seat."

Defiance was clear in her eyes, masking the wisp of desperation he saw trying to burst forth. "Try me."

Before Garrus could even make an attempt, the VI came blaring on. "Warning. Going at unsafe speed towards cliff edge. Scans of the nearby area indicate no suitable space to land and piles of spiky rocks below. Will reach in 300 meters. Would recommend decelerating."

That definitely didn't sound good. Even worse, Shepard showed no sign of slowing down. She seemed to be trapped in some type of haze.

So Garrus tried another tactic.

"Jane." It had felt so weird calling her that for the first time, her given name on his lips. She had been the one to insist he call her that when alone, though he couldn't promise he'd break the habit of calling her Shepard. He'd call her Jane now, though, use a name not many did, to try and get through to her.

"200 meters."

He squeezed her shoulder, meant to be more comforting than before. "Jane."

"100 meters."

"Jane," he whispered as tenderly as he could manage in a deep purr.

That brought her back to reality. She went into action, her fingers skimming over the buttons to try and slow them down before they reached the edge of the cliff. Garrus clung to the back of Shepard's seat, watching with anxiety as the cliff edge got closer and closer.

By some miracle, at the last second, they came to a screeching halt, with only a little bit of the Hammerhead hovering over the edge, but not enough they would come tumbling down the side of the rock.

She collapsed into her seat and Garrus could feelher violently trembling. She turned towards him, the shame clear in her eyes. The mask she had been wearing to everyone for the past two days had been chipped away, revealing the woman Thane had caught a glimpse of.

"Garrus, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean...I could have...You could have…" Her voice broke, wobbling heavily. "I'm such a monster."

Despite trying to get his own bearings back, Garrus wasted no time in laying a comforting hand on her wrist and tugging her out of her seat. "Come sit back here. I'll get us on firmer ground."

Not displaying any of the resistance she had before, Shepard let him lead her to the bench seat, probably still in shock at having possibly maimed or killed them in a major crash. Garrus took control of the Hammerhead, guiding them off the cliff edge and back down to the base, back on ground level.

He shut down the Hammerhead, not wanting to take her back to the Normandy yet. They needed to talk about this before it got even worse.

"I can't believe I almost did that." Shepard buried her face in her hands.

"That would have been nothing compared to the Mako. At least the Hammerhead doesn't flip. Could have been a lot worse." He didn't know how well he was succeeding at trying to lighten the mood.

Judging by the crestfallen look still on her face she revealed when she lowered her hands, not well. "I could have killed us, Garrus. All because I let my damn emotions get the better of me."

She hung her head. "Aratoht shouldn't have happened. I should have found another way. I didn't try hard enough. And I should have suspected Kenson was indoctrinated. I shouldn't, I shouldn't have let them die. And now I almost killed us…you…" She wasn't crying, but she sounded as close as he had ever heard her to breaking down into tears, her voice increasing in pitch and cracking with each sentence. "Everything's my fault."

Her hands curled into fists in her lap. He covered one with his hand. "Remember what you told me about having bad luck? It happens. You can't be expected to do everything perfectly."

She shook her head. "No, it doesn't _just_ happen. I know I've made a lot of tough choices, but this is different, Garrus. I'm nothing more than a mass murderer."

Garrus propped himself up against the bench seat, wrapping a firm arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer to him. Their armor clunked clumsily together, but they made it work, with Garrus situating Shepard's head so it was securely resting on his metal shoulder.

"You shouldn't be touching me," Shepard mumbled, though she made no move to pull away. "I'm tainted. I have the blood of hundreds of thousands on my hands."

"You had no choice," Garrus countered automatically. "It was either them or the Reapers invading. You bought us time, however long it may be. Their sacrifices were not in vain," he reasoned, trying to assure her as he should have in the first place.

Shepard's eyes closed, pressing into his hard shoulder, seeking out the comfort he offered. "I know. I keep telling myself that, but then I think about all those innocent people, snuffed out without any warning. A fire ball coming at them they hadn't even realized was coming. Dying before they could even scream." A strangled laugh escaped her. "You know what they'll say about me. That I killed them all on purpose, out of some deep-seated desire for revenge for what happened on Mindoir." She let out another desperate laugh, her body quaking. "Maybe they're right."

"Stop." Garrus's hands found themselves on either side of her face, tilting it to meet his gaze. He wouldn't take her talking about herself, demeaning herself, like that, when nothing could be further from the truth.

"I know you. If there had been any way to save them, you would have, no matter if they were batarians," he said with deep conviction, hoping she heard it in his voice and saw it on his face.

Her gaze fell away, but he cupped her chin and tilted it back up so she'd have to look at him. "And I know you know that. But if you can't believe that of yourself right now, will you believe me?"

Shepard's silence began to alarm him after a few moments. She hadn't blinked, she hadn't moved, she hadn't made a sound. Then, like it was a huge effort, she finally gave a small nod.

Garrus planted a kiss on her forehead best he could with his mouthplates and bathed her face with small, gentle kisses. Her nimble fingers traced his face, exploring the contours of his plates, her small fingers finding their way underneath the sensitive skin of his mandibles.

He didn't realize what was happening until he heard her gloves hit the floor and felt her hands travel to the releases of his own armor.

He pulled back from her face and grasped both of her wrists gently. "What are you doing?"

"What do you think, Garrus?" There it was. A small, weak smile, but it was there.

"Here? Now?" Not that he didn't want to. He didn't think he could ever get enough of her, but Shepard was still in a fragile emotional state. He didn't want to take advantage.

"Yes, here. Now." She pressed herself closer to him, brushing her forehead against his. "I want to forget." She pulled at his hands holding her wrists so they came to rest on one of the latches to her upper armor. "I want to let go."

He didn't need any more incentive, moving forward to press his mouth against hers, his tongue finding its way into her mouth and dancing with hers. They wasted no time in shedding themselves of their armor, practically tossing the pieces to the floor of the Hammerhead, and their undersuits. Garrus even unhooked his visor, the third time she's ever seen him without it. He felt kind of bare without it on his face, but it was worth it when she dragged her tongue across that side of his face.

He lowered her down onto the seat with a steadying hand on the small of her back, kissing down the length of her body, nicking her neck and soothing the bite by running his tongue over it, lavishing her breasts and sucking on her nipples without biting down on them with his sharp teeth. His hand found his way down between her legs, teasingly running his talon over the slit. His plates shifted when he felt how wet she already was. Turian women didn't do that when aroused, but he quickly found himself appreciating that difference between species.

Shepard's hands danced around his carapace, finding their way in between the plates, her hands lowering down to his shifting plates, coaxing him until he finally sprung free. But he didn't allow her much time to tease him. By how she pressed up against himself, both of them were too far gone to tease the other.

He grabbed her wrists again and pinned her down to the seat, capturing her lips with his in a bruising kiss. He wrapped her legs around his waist, resting them over his hip spurs, positioning himself until he slid into her slick heat, both of them barely containing a pleased groan at the joining.

He took a moment to pull away and just cherish the sight in front of him, her flushed face, her eyes smoldering with an intensity reserved only for him, her auburn strands fanned out beneath her like a pillow. The back of his talon was a ghost touch across her cheek. He was going to make this last, as long as he could. She deserved nothing less.

He slowly withdrew, dragging it out, before pushing back in just as slowly, taking pleasure in the satisfied gasp that emitted from her throat. He kept it slow at first, wanting to build up. He still couldn't get over how good she felt, how her hot and tight channel clamped down on him, sending pleasurable jolts throughout his body, leaving little to no room for any coherent thought except that he never wanted this feeling to end.

She called out his name in a strangled whisper. She rocked her hips against his, silently urging him to go faster. He put the force of his entire body into the thrusts (the meds must've kicked in, as his ribs didn't protest at the movements), both of them giving deep-throated moans at the increased tempo and strength. He had released her wrists, allowing her hands to curl around his shoulders, her blunt nails digging into the hide. His head fell into the crook of her neck, licking and kissing any inch of skin in reach, a deep rumble escaping him.

"Garrus…" She was getting close. He could tell by how much she was shaking, the tightening of her legs at his waist and hands on his shoulders, her panting breaths like she couldn't get enough air in her lungs. It almost brought him to the edge too, realizing he was the cause of it, her coming undone like this. But he wanted her to come first.

He increased his pace, only to pull back right before she reached that precipice. He could hear her cursing him in a language his translator couldn't pick up. He'd have to remember to ask about it when lucid thought was allowed again.

He was close now too. He put everything he had into it, slamming and pumping, his hard scales and hide slapping against her soft skin.

"Let go, Jane," he said in a harsh whisper into her left ear, permitting her to reach her high.

She threw her head back into the seat, coming with a choked scream, which he swallowed with his mouth plates, her inner muscles spasming around him so tightly he saw stars in the back of his eyes. That ensured he wasn't too far behind, with only a few erratic thrusts until he finally spilled into her.

He was careful not to collapse on top of her, despite the enormous effort it took to stay on his elbows. With hardly any room on the bench seat to maneuver, he positioned themselves so that he leaned up against a side of the Hammerhead, her limp, satiated form lying on her side in between his legs, her head tucked securely under his.

"Thank you," she whispered tiredly.

Garrus stroked the sweat-dewed skin at her waist where his hand rested and nuzzled her head with his mandible. "Anytime."

The edges of her lips curled in a lazy smile. "Anytime, huh? I just might have to take you up on that."

"Maybe not in the Hammerhead again." He shifted his head, trying to find a more comfortable place to rest it, without much success. "Definitely not comfortable."

"And here I was hoping we could just stay down here."

"Unless the Hammerhead has a secret kitchen and bathroom the VI didn't tell us about it, we have to go back."

"Speaking of which, remind me to clean the seats once we get back." Her face suddenly fell as she continued, "Though I doubt we'll have much need of this now."

He shouldn't have said anything. He had ruined the moment, caused her to remember what he had been trying to help her overcome.

Shepard must have sensed his remorse as he found her hands reaching up to the back of his neck, tilting his head towards her. He met her lips eagerly.

"It's ok. I'm a little better than I've been the past two days. All thanks to you," she said when she pulled away.

"That's what I'm here for."

She settled back down in the crook of his neck, kissing the skin her mouth rested on. "You know, I'll really miss you, Garrus," she said softly.

He didn't want to think about what would happen when the Alliance finally summoned her back to Earth or how long they would be separated. All they could do was prepare the best they could and treasure the time they had together, whether it was another month, a week, or even just a few days.

He wanted to tell her how much she had come to mean to him, but he wasn't ready to say it or sure if she was ready to hear it.

So he settled for clutching her tighter to his body and murmuring into the crown of her head just as softly, "I'll miss you too, Jane."


End file.
